Tough days

I had a mixed day yesterday. On one hand, Mr. J and I had friends over and played Rock Band and had a knee slapping good time. On the other, it was pointed out to me that my low progesterone level is indicative of not having ovulated, NOT actually having low progesterone. Well, I still could have low progesterone, the point is, I don't know. That crushed me, I was so optimistic that we had finally found something to fix, and I really felt like I was doing something productive by taking the progesterone, but now? Who knows? I want to stay positive, but sometimes I feel like I'm on the verge of giving up completley. I don't want to keep getting pregnant only to have more miscarriages.

Well, I can't find a way to spin that particular subject in a positive light right now, so I'm just going to put it on the backburner. I'm sure I'll eventually have a eureka moment about this and start feeling better, but for now I don't even want to think about it.

On a positive note, I feel really good in the aspects of my life that don't involve my body. I have just started the program at Flylady.com, and I am loving it. For those of you who don't know, my nickname as a child was Missy mess pot, and I never grew out of it. Flylady.com gives me a program to get the CHAOS (Can't have anyone over syndrome) out of my life. I really love it, because even though I should know better, I thought I was the only one out there who liked having a clean house...but didn't. So far so good in that aspect, and it is so much less stressful to come home to a clean(er..still a work in progress) house.

Also, we have decided to transition our outdoor dog, Ruby, into an indoor one. She spent most of her time outside or on the patio, and she was the only pet in our house who wasn't really a member of the family. The reason for this is that she was too "hyper" (read: underexcercised). Finally, we couldn't stand how sad she looked all the time, especially knowing that it was our fault. We gave her a nice bath, dried her off, and let her in, for good. It's amazing now, how happy she is, and how great it is to have both of our doggies inside with us. We had one, maybe two days of hyperness, and non-stop playing between Ruby and Copper (our other dog), but now things have become normal. I imagine that in a few weeks I won't even be able to imagine her as anything but a house dog.

Now that my house is starting to be a bit cleaner, I've been able to enjoy some more cooking and baking. This is the Stuffed Pizza Rolls recipe from ourbestbites.com. It was yummy. (http://www.ourbestbites.com/2009/06/stuffed-pizza-rolls.html)

Before (We only had turkey bacon for these. I made them again last night
with turkey bacon, pepperoni and ham. Yum!)

After (With Pizza Sauce and Ranch Pizza Sauce for dipping)

And with my pretty, decorated for Christmas, stove

Its a winter wonderland

Now that Thanksgiving is over, it seems funny that I worried so much about it. It was one of the best Thanksgivings of my life. Mr. J and I drove to my Dad and Stepmoms farm in Wisconsin. It is a beautiful place. Before they bought it, it used to be my grandparents vacation home, and we would spend Christmases there, so I always love going back. The food was great, but certainly not the best part of the weekend. After dinner, it's family tradition to watch a James Bond movie, and during that I had my Aunt and Grandma both sitting on the couch with me, all knitting away on our winter projects. The next day, we went out to the shooting range and destroyed some old computers, a car door, and a scarecrow. We also shot at some targets my Dad had set up, and Mr J. got it in the center ring with my Grammys old Smith & Wesson. That night, we all went to the bar, except for Mr. J who caught cold. It was a fun time, because I got to hang out, play pinball, shoot pool, (and lose by one stinking ball!) with my cousin Tim who I barely see. I always think of him as much younger than me, but I'm only two years older, and we had a great time.

The next day, we went back to the woods and cut fresh evergreens and berries to make Christmas wreaths and swags for the house. I even made a few to take home. After that, we all shot skeet. My dad has a range right there on the farm, and he coaches the local High School's shooting team. We all practiced from the easy spots, then Dad and Tim shot a whole round. After that, I elbowed my way into the next match, and for my very first round of skeet ever, I shot a 13! Once again, Tim beat me by one lousy point.

The next morning, I helped clean out the horse barn before leaving. The whole weekend was amazing, and I'm so glad we were able to go and have that time with my family.

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A funny thing happened here this year. Throughout November, the weather was pretty warm here in Michigan. As Mr. J and I drove to Wisconsin for Thanksgiving, we didn't even bother to put on our warm coats when going in to stores. (Wisconsin itself was a different, much colder story). Anyways, November was very mild, and as soon as the calendar rolled over to December, the snow started falling. I literally woke up on December first to snow on the ground, and thats as it should be! Lets hope its gone by March.

You know, you can tell that you're getting older when you start to hate the snow. Part of me still loves it, and it certainly is beautiful, but a much larger part of me likes being warm and able to drive without sliding all over the place.